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Gender Terminology  |
Family Response It is common for parents to blame themselves when a child falls outside of the norm. They ask themselves, “Is it my fault somehow?” “Where did I go wrong?” Mothers may feel they were too permissive. Fathers may be angry and refuse to accept their gender variant child, especially if this child was born a boy. A child with a gender-fluid expression can be very challenging and frustrating for parents. A lack of consistency in their child’s gender expression can leave parents wondering just who their child ‘really’ is. Some parents feel desperate to find a solid answer—male or female. This “back and forth” expression can leave them feeling there is no foundation with which to move forward. Gender variance is not an illness or a result of poor parenting. It is not the result of divorce or an indication of child abuse. Gender variance is not caused by liberal or permissive parenting or by a parent who secretly wished their child were the ‘opposite’ sex. It is normal. You did not cause this or do anything wrong. Current research supports the theory that gender is, to some extent, “hard-wired” in the brain from birth. • Assumptions About Gender Identity • Siblings |
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